[E-mail 작성] Regarding conference call preparation

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Senario :
You are the head of the business development division for a large corporatioin. You are working with a juniorr colleague to prepare a conference all with an overseas business partner. Write an email with a checklist of taskes you want the junior colleague to prepare before the conference call.

 

Sky blue color is what I wrote after correcting based on Feedback

Red color is 'a/the' has missed before.

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Subject : Request for Preparation of Conference call.
-> Regarding Conference call preparation (불필요한 대문자 뺄 것)

To. Janson

HI,

-> Dear Janson, (Dear 사람이름 뒤에 ',' 쉼표)

I'm writing this e-mail to request for preparation of conference call.

-> I'm writing to request for preparation of conference call.
We have a schedule to make a conference call with an overseas business partner.

So, I want you to make sure several things before conference call.

-> I want you to take the lead in preparing for the meeting thoroughly.

-> Make sure 표현은 뒤에 '주어 + 동사' 형태의 구조로 자주 사용되거나, Make sure to 구조로 사용됨

Please refer to check list below.

1. Check the availability of all participants
   : This task should be on the highest priority

2. Make a reservation for a meeting room on our internal system.
   : If you checked available date and time for all the participants, then you make a reservation.
-> When/After you check available date and time for all the participants, then you make a reservation.

-> 'If'는 일어나기 힘든 상황을 가정할 때 주로 사용되며, 시제를 맞춰주기 위해 Checked 대신 check으로 수정

3. Send e-mail to all attendees
   : 1st(notice) - when all setting is finished
     2nd(remind) - 20 minutes before starting a conference call
Information about date&time, meeting room location, the participants list, URL link to access, agenda shouldn't be excluded.

-> Information on date, time, meeting room loacation, participants list, URL link to access agenda need to be included.

-> Information은 주로 전치사 'on'과 함께 쓰임.

-> Formal한 e-mail에서는 '&' 기호 사용 자제, 나열형 구조일 때는 마지막 앞에 'and' 사용.

-> "해야한다"라는 의미 표현에서 강도는

    Must(엄격한 수준, 잘 사용 X) > Need to/Have to(꼭 해야 한다) > Should (해도 되고 안 해도 되는 정도)

4. Check setting on device
: A camera, A microphone, A key board, A mouse, A display and connection of the Internet in the conference room.

Need to check if all devices can be operated well.

5. Contact and Inform to key persons individually

-> Inform key people individually

-> Inform 사람 for 목적어 "A에게 B를 알리다" 구조로 사용됨

: Contact to person who is responsible for each session and inform the content so that they have enough time to prepare their materials if it's needed.

-> Contact person who is responsible for each session in advance so that they have enough time to prepare materials if needed

-> Contact 뒤에 to 없이 연락 대상이 오는 구조

-> If it's needed는 If needed로 사용

6. Make sure and bring your smartphone

-> Make sure to bring your own smartphone
: Need recording all things that we'll talk about not to miss anything during conference call
-> Need to record all the things the we'll talk about not to miss anything during a coference call

-> all things 대신 all the things

As you know, we frequently have some chances to have a conference call with our clients. So, I think the experience in this time will really helpful for you in company life.
-> I think the experience will be really helpful for you.

 

If you have any questions during preparation for conference call,
Do not hesitate to contact me promptly.
-> If you have any questions for preparation for a conference call, do not hesitate to contact me promptly.

-> 불필요한 줄바꿈 지양할 것

Best regards.
Hyungpyo LEE.

-> Best regards,

Hyungpyo Lee

-> Best regards 뒤에 ',' 쉼표 들어가야함

-> 이름 뒤에 '.' 마침표 삭제필요

 

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그 밖의 Feedback 사항들

 

every 뒤에 '단수'만 올 수 있음
every single step.

8 A.M -> A와 M사이에 반드시 a period(점) '.' 가 들어가야 함

Dear 누구, -> 사람 뒤에 comma(쉼표) ',' 가 들어가야 함

Inform A of B : A에게 B를 알리다.

Information + on (전치사 on이랑 함께 자주 사용된다.)

make sure 뒤에는 'S+V', '주어 + 동사'로 문장이 나와줘야 함.
아니면, make sure to 구조로 사용할 필요가 있음

all things -> all the things

Best regards, -> 뒤에 반드시 쉼표 들어가야 함
Janson -> 뒤에 마침표 찍지 말아야 함

the Internet connection 'has access to' 

if it's needed -> if needed 로 대체해야 함

Pressure의 단계
1. 엄격한 수준 must (필요한 곳 아니면 안 씀)
2. 꼭 해야 되는 정도 need to (=have to)
3. 부탁은 하는데 강제성 없음 should

discuss to renew our contract : 우리 계약 갱신을 위해 토론하다.
take the lead in : ~을 주도적으로 진행하다.
manage to : 겨우 해내다.
last but not least : 마지막으로
They are willing to help you : 그들은 널 기꺼이 도와줄거야
dyslexia: 난독증
dysfuntional: 멘붕
correspondence : 서신
ASAP 는 가운데 점(period) 찍지 말 것.